I'm a Realist. And a Perfectionist. This creates many problems for me, as you can imagine. I'm all about sharing examples so that other people "get it" when I'm trying to explain something, but honestly, there's not an example that would make sense to anyone else.
My mom is an optimist. She loves to expect and look for the best - in any situation, in any person, in EVERYthing. I like that about her. In fact, I love that about her! We need optimists in this world. Otherwise, it would feel like it was all going to pot with no chance of redemption. And that's just not the case.
For the realist (at least in my case), I hope for the best and think the best of people, but I mentally and emotionally prepare myself for the worst to happen - just in case. In other words, I try to prepare for disappointment before it happens so that if (or when) it happens I'm ready to deal with the fall out. Sometimes I'll even say, "I knew it. I knew that would happen." Other times I think, "Well, that wasn't what I expected, but at least I am prepared to deal with it."
I can't divulge anything right now, but I've been in the middle of a ... circumstance (for lack of a better word), and I've found myself in the position of Realist. I want the best, and I'm hoping for the best, but I'm also preparing for the worst (or an end that I don't really want).
So where does the Perfectionist part come in?
"Failures" are really, really difficult sometimes! Failures are actually good for us - if we learn from them. I'm choosing to learn, and that's a good thing. What lesson is to be learned? That's yet to be known. The Perfectionist in me says when I've failed I've done something wrong. That's not always the case, but the Perfectionist says, "You didn't do it perfectly. Try again! And this time don't fail!" We can be tough on ourselves.
When I know more about my circumstance I'll share. Or should I say when it ends I'll share? Either way, I'm choosing to be a Realist in the meantime and not let Perfectionism take over and tell me I've failed or faltered. Wish me luck! This could be a loooooong trial. Or not?
Adam and Eve were in a perfect place; perfect for their place and time. In time though, Adam was enticed and declined the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil. Did he fail? For a time, it appears that he did. Then Eve was enticed and in spite of not doing it of her own free will, accepted the enticement and partook of the forbidden fruit. Did she fail? It appears so as an outward disobedience to God’s plan. Yet, she soon gained wisdom and with that newfound knowledge encouraged Adam to partake or be left alone. So he partook and from an outward appearance it would look like they failed. But they didn’t fail. They were given another chance, in fact a better opportunity in such a way that they could not and would not recognize for some time. And yet it was Eve, who recognized the blessings that came to them as a result of partaking of the fruit and creating opportunities for untold billions to receive as well.
ReplyDeleteSis, you haven’t done something wrong. Maybe you took a different path or route than He who knows all things desire best for you. Nevertheless, when things go sour, or don’t work out or we recognize the follies of your way blessed is the individual who “draw near unto me” with their hearts. Hang in there, revel in the moment and continue to learn in a realistic manner and leave your “perfectionist state of mind” at the door, let Him in and let Him carry the burden – the burden of making up the difference in perfection.
May peace be unto you and your soul.